Making a difference, differently
“Professionally, I still want to change the world – or at least make Suffolk a better place to live.”
Interview: Sue Wilcock | Martine Silkstone
Pictures: Warren Page
Tara Spence talks to Suffolk Director
Living in our beautiful but ethnically less-than-diverse county, Tara Spence disrupts the status quo simply by being a woman of colour – but she doesn’t stop there.
In her 17 years at Home-Start in Suffolk, she has also changed the way in which the charity approaches its vital work in the community, using data-driven strategies and a focus on future planning to build credibility and fulfil its important mission: to give children the best possible start in life, and to empower parents with the knowledge they need to grow in confidence and wellbeing.
She says: “Knowing that so many more families need our help drives me to push for growth and development, so we can reach even more people and make an even bigger impact. With that in mind, data informs every decision we make; we only go where evidence shows we can deliver meaningful outcomes, for both those we support and the wider community. The outcome has got to be more important than anything else. Then I feel that I’ve achieved something.”
Looking at the results, it is clear her plan is working.
When she started in 2007, the charity supported just 45 families a year – today it offers practical and emotional support to more than 1,400 families a year, harnessing the power of volunteers to provide a wealth of services including home visits and specialist groups.
Now fully established in the role of CEO, she is taking her expertise nationwide and offering her skills and experience to relevant boards and steering groups to ensure the voices of families and the voluntary sector are heard far and wide; challenging the traditional systems, pushing for innovation, and advocating for the policies that communities really need.
“I love the voluntary sector so much,” she smiles. “Even though there’s no money to do anything, there is the mentality to get it done and the flexibility to do it.
“For me, it’s not just about delivering services; it’s about delivering results that are recognised by everyone involved, from our teams to the clients themselves. It’s this collaborative approach that ensures we deliver where it matters most.
“But we can still do more, and it’s that potential to do more that fuels my passion every day.”
Where it all began
Tara was born in London in 1980 and spent her first few weeks in foster care before being adopted by loving parents in Suffolk – both of whom were already leading the way as disruptors in their own lives. As a mixed-race couple – her mother is white and her father Indian – their marriage was seen as very unconventional in the 1960s, and their subsequent adoption of a child was widely “frowned upon” by both sides of the family.
Nevertheless, Tara then gained a younger sister at the age of five and both girls grew up at their home in Finningham where her parents still live today. During that time her father worked for the NHS as a nurse and ward sister (still disrupting expectations) and her mother was a carer specialising in mental health and learning disabilities.
Tara says her adoptive parents were “absolutely amazing”, and she has fond childhood memories of dressing up and making bread with her “eccentric aunt” who worked as a Victorian Chef in a museum. It sparked a passion for both pastimes that continues to this day – but more on that later.
Despite her happy home, life was not easy as the only people of colour in their sleepy village. Starting school as a half Indian, half Caribbean young girl, with dark skin and afro hair, Tara struggled to fit in and she experienced “appalling” racial bullying throughout her education.
She remembers: “Up until I was 16, I was the only non-white person in school, and it always felt like things were stacked against you if you didn’t fit the norm. The weekly stress of having to get a swimming hat over afro hair and teachers not being able to pronounce your Indian surname. You soon stand out as different!”
“Of course, if I’d have been born 20 years later, I would have aced my teenage years but in the 90s beauty standards were more Kate Moss than Nicki Minaj, so it wasn’t fun at all.”
To try and fit in, she would often undertake charitable fundraising activities in school – perhaps a hint of the career to come – and when home she found her escape in fantasy books, reading Lord of the Rings at the age of seven and working her way through the school library. It was then that she also discovered her love of role-playing computer games, going on adventures and hiding in the safety of another world.
“I was so lucky that my parents recognised what a difficult time I had with bullying and bought me my first computer. Gaming gave me a break from the problems I was having at school and it has remained a constant thing throughout my life. I consider myself one of the OG [original] gamers,” she says proudly.
Finding her path
After GCSEs, Tara went on to do her A Levels and, having seen the glamourous Virgin Atlantic adverts on television, she dreamed of becoming a flight attendant and travelling to exotic destinations. Unfortunately, she was an inch too short but that was probably for the best as it turns out she hates flying!
With no other career path in mind, she decided to let fate decide her future – sticking a pin in the Suffolk College prospectus and ending up in hospitality management. Part of her course meant spending time in Germany where she made good friends and grew in confidence, returning to complete the qualification then working in places including the Marriott in Ipswich and Cedars Hotel in Stowmarket (haunted apparently – but that’s another story).
It was fun to start with: “Working in hospitality, I got to know enough people to never queue for a nightclub and generally got a few free drinks too,” she grins.
But, despite these perks of the job, eventually the low wages and a particularly difficult manager led Tara to decide it was time for a change.
Her parents had started their own care home by this point, and she decided to join the family business, starting as a carer then moving into an administrative role, writing policies for health and safety and dealing with payroll. In 2003, after the home was sold to a national care company, she became the youngest registered manager in Suffolk at the age of 23.
Becoming grounded
It was in her early 20s that Tara also met her first husband on a night out in Ipswich. The couple married in 2006 but Tara says, looking back, she was too young for the commitment. They divorced in 2015 but had two “amazing” daughters, Isabella and Ellis, who she says are her greatest personal achievement, giving her a blood tie that finally allowed her to feel grounded.
“They are everything I wished I could have been at their age,” she says proudly. “They’re confident, assertive, and unafraid to call out injustice. Where I once felt pressure to fit in and look like everyone else, they celebrate their individuality.”
“I couldn’t be prouder to have helped raise women with both the strength and courage to make a difference.”
Unfortunately, while growing her family, her own ability to make a difference was being challenged. The care home was now under the umbrella of a large residential care company and Tara found the focus on money and profit disheartening.
It was time to look for a new role.
Charity begins at Home-Start
In 2007, she applied for the position of senior support coordinator at what was Home-Start Suffolk Coastal. Now a mother herself, the chance to help other parents was something that resonated immediately and she was pleased to be invited for an interview.
“It was rather memorable,” she recalls.
“It consisted of a one-to-one meeting and a group where the six candidates were debating a challenging scenario. Ten minutes in, things were getting a little heated when I realised that I needed the loo. Having recently had a baby, my bladder wasn’t up to the job, so I excused myself. When I got the call to say I had been successful, they said the panel liked that I had removed myself from the situation when it became heated and took time out to reframe my thoughts. I didn’t correct them,” she laughs.
Starting in her first charity role, there was much to learn and Tara spent a lot of time training and reading as much about the sector as possible. From the beginning, she approached it not as a charity but as a small business. Still, the early days were challenging. The organisation was structurally complicated and many fundamental things weren’t in place. Changes needed to be made.
Making her mark
The first few years were spent building up resources, assembling evidence, and data gathering; getting to a financial place where the charity could do more.
By 2014, the service had expanded into new areas and there was sufficient information for Suffolk County Council to support and recognise their valuable work. Just three years later, following a competitive tender process and merger with another charity, the team was awarded a contract to provide countywide support for families for the next few years, with Tara as executive manager of the new Home-Start in Suffolk.
From this point, growth accelerated rapidly, with the team expanding from five to 26 staff members in three months, and from 250 to more than 1,000 families supported each year.
In 2019, Tara became the CEO.
In her role as charity leader, she says it’s crucial to be trusted and credible, and to be present in the right rooms where change happens – though that is something she found hard going at times.
“I was going into meeting rooms as a woman and a woman of colour, so it was difficult.”
“I spent a lot of time listening and learning. Now, I can make my voice heard if I want to, but it’s taken me a lot of time to get there.”
Connect and grow
While finding her place at the table, Tara enlisted the help of a few Suffolk mentors. She specifically chose people with different personalities and experience; people who could offer guidance and wisdom, and help her to establish a network of support in the county.
Of course, sometimes an important introduction can come out of the blue.
For example, when a new employee casually mentioned that he knew the famous author, Anthony Horowitz. A few conversations and one office visit later, the Suffolk-based writer became patron of the charity having, apparently…ahem…appreciated their dedication to the cause.
“When he first came to visit us, he loved that our office was such a mess,” Tara laughs. “Everything’s broken, there are stacks of boxes everywhere, and even the biscuits we have were donated. He just said that this is clearly an organisation that puts all its money back into the work – which was very true actually.”
An offer of friendship
Tara believes that approach is what sets them apart – that, and always putting people at the heart of decisions.
“What we do as an organization can look complex on paper, but it’s so simple; it’s just friendship. It’s about having somebody that champions you and makes sure that you’re doing okay.
“Our volunteers are integral to providing that support and we have worked hard to ensure that all team members get feedback on the service they have delivered. We also do a lot of work to decide which volunteer will get on with which family – we like to think of ourselves as a more successful dating agency!”
“Ultimately, the whole service is built on relationships and our success stems from this.”
Since becoming CEO, she has also seen the charity through Covid, met with Wes Streeting MP (now Secretary of State for Health and Social Care) to advocate for better access to health services, highlighted the challenges of poor charitable funding, and worked with Dame Andrea Leadsom’s Start for Life team to discuss the changing needs of the county.
Today, she sits as a trustee for the national organisation, Home-Start UK, and acts as a consultant for other charities, offering guidance around governance and training.
But it’s not all about work…
Hooked by love
In 2017, with a little help from the dating platform Plenty of Fish, Tara met her now-husband, Andrew. The couple dated for three years and were planning their wedding for 2020 when the pandemic happened.
“It was supposed to be a big event and, of course, that didn’t happen,” she recalls. “But actually, I had the most perfect wedding at Woodbridge Registry Office that July. It was just us, with our best friends as witnesses and lunch at the Great House in Lavenham after.
“Our honeymoon was in the Lake District with the kids and when we got home, we bought a lockdown-wedding puppy (Lucy), so the family is complete,” she smiles.
Now happily settled in Kesgrave, when home Tara can often be found cooking up new recipes, watching sci-fi box sets, or baking bread. [At this point, we asked if she had a bread-maker and she looked insulted – all hand-made apparently.]
Of course, gaming is still a favourite pastime and Tara is keen to add that she is the reigning Mario Kart champ, though adventure games are still her favourite way to disappear into a fantasy world.
Continuing the theme of escapism, she also takes any opportunity to dress up and enjoys immersive experiences like Secret Cinema where you become another character for the night. Most recently she could be found as an Astral Queen from Guardians of the Galaxy, but her dream is to be a Disney Princess – the kick-ass Tiana, obviously – so watch this space…
So, what’s next?
“Now our children are getting older, my husband and I are finding more time for new pursuits. Lately, that involves plenty of food and cocktails. Our most recent project is the pizza oven we built in our garden – although we’ve burnt more crusts than not so far…possibly due to the cocktails!
“I also absolutely love Christmas, so I’m always thinking about plans for the big day,” she says excitedly.
“Professionally, I still want to change the world – or at least make Suffolk a better place to live.
“My motivation for getting up in the morning is knowing that, while we do an amazing job supporting our families, we are only scratching the surface. That is what drives me to push for growth and development, so we can reach even more people and make a bigger impact.”
